“You can have my beer, Helen Zille – but give me running water!”
It seems an odd combination to put Helen Zille, Ozempic, and beer into the same conversation, but that is how it is when you are a regular podcast consumer trying to consolidate thoughts on a complicated topic.
Everyone is talking about Helen Zille becoming the DA’s candidate for the upcoming municipal elections in Johannesburg. The podcasters have strong opinions about it, and for good reason. Jo’burg is the largest metro in the country and remains the centre of our country’s economy.
Whoever wins there, in person and in party, will have scored a major demographic and political victory. It’s a big deal.
In fact, Rob Hersov, the highly eccentric and recently very sharp founder of the Truth Report, said that Zille running for mayor might be the most significant chess move on the SA political spectrum in quite some time. (He said Frans Cronje told him this while they were on an aeroplane flight from Cape Town.) Hersov also said that Ozempic is a wonder drug, and that he lost 10 kilograms in two months without changing his diet or doing any exercise. (Frans Cronje had nothing to do with that, I believe.)
Both claims might be too much of a sales pitch, but I heard Frans Cronje ask Roman Cabanac in a podcast who the DA leader in Gauteng was. When Cabanac couldn’t answer, Cronje replied: “That is the problem.”
Cronje contended that the DA needed a charismatic character that people knew and trusted, and who was a force to be reckoned with, otherwise voters would not show up. He said it was time the DA understood this about ANC politics and the minds of voters in the country. I won’t be surprised if that comment played a part in Zille’s decision to consider running for mayor and, according to Hersov, move to Jo’burg and live in an RDP house until everything is sorted out.
Damn
I can’t comment on Zille’s ambitions to live in RDP houses, but I can share that I, too, have used Ozempic and achieved much less stellar results than Hersov, while exercising and eating better. The rich just keep on getting richer and thinner, while the rest of us don’t. Damn.
Prince Mashele, a powerful thinker and communicator, said this on the topic of the Sizwe Mpofu-Walsh podcast: “I am going to do something I have never done in my life. And I am not a DA supporter, but if she runs, I will endorse Helen Zille for mayor of Johannesburg.”
He said the absence of water in Sandton was a national disgrace and another sign of the ANC’s shocking record of governance in Johannesburg. “Rob Hersov?!” He said the ANC was now a ‘bunch of criminals’ with Ramaphosa the criminal in chief.
“As a citizen, I am very concerned. Our state is drifting unguided, and those who are supposed to be guardians of our future no longer have the interests of the nation at heart.”
Both Mpofu-Walsh and I looked at him in silence, thinking: “He said it, not me!” Mashele’s endorsement of Zille is largely an anti-ANC position, not necessarily pro-Zille. “Everything they touch turns to dust. Full stop.”
A more technical and constitutional discussion was offered by the Rational Standard podcast, which is often the case. I sometimes find it tough to keep up, but it can be worth it. Helen Zille was discussed within the framework of decentralisation and a hope that some sort of federalism returns to DA politics. While there is a lot of privatisation and decentralisation of services happening already in the form of private security and rooftop solar, for instance, we need scalable solutions which rely on political intervention.
Welcome contrast
Zakes Mthembu, whose bright smile is a welcome contrast to the suits and beards of the rest of the panel, asks: “What happens after Zille, even if she is a success? It is about changing a system of thinking.” Mthembu says we have to teach people that it is cool to be responsible for themselves and not rely on government for everything.
“I hope she wins,” quips Mthembu. “I will probably vote for her. Not because I like her, but because I love Jo’burg.” He says people will vote for whomever they believe is more likely to deliver services.
“I don’t like everything about Zille; her attitude towards not selling alcohol over weekends is a problem for me,” he laughs.
“But I want water. I am selfish. I like a hot shower. I will sacrifice my beer to Helen if she can give us reliable running water. Please, we want water!”
Zille is certainly qualified for the role. In the political arena, Zille has served in all three tiers of government: as the Western Cape’s education MEC, as a Member of Parliament, as Mayor of Cape Town, and as Premier of the Western Cape. Zille was selected as World Mayor of the Year in 2008. Will that be enough to convince voters?
Massive impact
Tom Eaton thinks not. In a TimesLive piece, he suggests that the ‘Zillefication of Johannesburg is Mission Impossible.” He posits it as unlikely that her running for mayor will have the massive impact Hersov thinks it will. Voters are too young and Jo’burg is falling apart. People might not care enough to fix it. Michael Morris, the head of media at the IRR (Institute of Race Relations) hopes Zille discounts Eaton’s caution and gives it her best shot. He says Zille has the “Confidence and clarity of conscience, as well as the political courage to show what being answerable means.” Zille herself has indicated she will rise to Morris’s call by declaring: “Jo’burg might be tired, but I am not.”
I would add to Zille’s CV that she has bigger balls than John Steenhuisen and Cyril Ramaphosa, possibly put together. That must count for something. She is also fun and multi-faceted. Did you know, she was recently a finalist in a reality cooking show, “Kom ons braai.” She appears on Facebook in a sexy lace apron, whipping up pineapple upside-down cake while her sons laugh at her. How cool is that? It shows a person with a broad scope of skills, capacity, and humanity, much of which is sorely lacking in politics today. Her victory will be a sign for South Africans that we have the power to change leaders and parties. We need this as a win for us, the voters, because we have become addicted to the status quo. I would vote for her if I lived in Johannesburg.
PRS SURVEY
The final word, as is custom on The Podcast Report, goes to a sample of the PRS data set. The Podcast Report Survey is a random sample of ordinary South African I come across while writing this. I asked the cashier at the checkout counter at the supermarket what she thought of the idea of Helen Zille running for mayor of Johannesburg.
She looked at me for a moment, then said: “Wait, are you Helen Zille?” I said I wasn’t but that it was an easy mistake to make; I am sure all maturing white ladies look the same to her. The teller asked: “Zille, she is from Cape Town now, isn’t she? She is very good.”
I said people are saying Zille is so good at fixing problems, they want her to go to Johannesburg and fix theirs. The teller had none of that.
“If she is so good at fixing problems, she must stay here and fix ours. We have enough. Jo’burg must sort out their own mess. Suka wena!”
The views of the writer are not necessarily the views of the Daily Friend or the IRR.
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