I like the way I look in a tinfoil hat. It brings out the colour of my eyes. I fancy how the headgear accepts the light and reflects it at different angles. Most people don’t like being described as ‘conspiratorial’, but I am now okay with it.
It is perfectly reasonable to have a viewpoint that some people, or groups of people, act in their own interest, without telling us, screwing us over while they are at it. It’s not ‘conspiracy’ – it’s human nature. This proclivity is noticeable in governments, big businesses, and maniacs with a God complex who want to ‘save’ the world by taking our freedoms away or impoverishing us because they believe they have found a simple and unified solution to the vast complexities and varieties of being human.
What is the difference between a conspiracy theory and the truth, anyway? About six months, if the Covid event and Davos are anything to go by. A tinfoil hat has become the discerning intellectual’s thinking cap, perhaps not to be donned as an everyday essential but certainly as an accessory to be thrown on casually, prêt-à-porter style, and kept in good condition.
Most notably, over the past two years, ‘conspiracy theories’ that have come true have been found on the cover of Time magazine: vaccines and the WEF. At first, however, anyone suggesting the vaccine data was flawed from the outset or that vaccine passports might be introduced to satisfy a technocratic power hunger was dismissed as the ‘lunatic fringe’.
Then, as reports of data fraud, outright lies, media manipulation, regulatory state capture and protracted lockdowns emerged, the same people just shrugged: ‘Ah, well, that’s big pharma for you. I am sure the government was only doing its best.’ Then, when presented with evidence, the same people simply revised their judgement of the issue – while retaining the pejorative for the person urging the original (proven correct) caution. ‘Tinfoil! TINFOIL!!’ they shout and jeer, fuming with righteous indignation and cognitive dissonance. When behaviour like this is so stark, nasty and contradictory, it is often an indication that we are protecting ourselves from something worse than the original paradox.
The UN recently declared war on conspiracy theories, assuring us that events are NOT ‘secretly manipulated behind the scenes by powerful forces with negative intent’. I agree with the UN on this – it is not happening in secret. It is not a conspiracy if an illustrious publication like Time dedicates a whole issue to the WEF and their ambitions for a ‘Great Reset’, it is news. Let me be clear on my position on this. Klaus Schwab and the other Davos cronies are not evil; they are rich, stupid and powerful – a much more dangerous combination for you than ‘evil’. They say that the world has to lose some of its population, most of its property rights and all of its common sense: ‘You will have nothing. And you will be happy,’ they promise. I don’t necessarily disagree with Schwab’s assessment of the situation nor his solution, but to deny that it is a plan is outrageous.
They have a blueprint they have been nurturing and putting into action with powerful finance and philosophical ambition as motivation. I don’t know if the WEF will succeed, and they don’t have to for me to avoid being called a ‘flat-earther’ should I dare point out there is a group of people up to something they are not entirely honest about, and that I don’t believe will be good for us. I am not the one in denial here. You are. Why are you behaving so foolishly? Human nature. Mark Twain said it best: ‘It is easier to fool people than convince them they have been fooled.’ It is a less psychic effort for people to pretend they knew all along or ‘don’t care, anyway’ than to own up to being naive enough to fall for it at all. The pendulum swings both ways, of course. Between the true ‘flat-earthers’ and the pro-lockdown zealots, there is a messy, multi-shaded and complicated middle-ground where the truth lies, if you dare to look for it.
I mentioned two trending examples of conspiracy theories here, but there are many. That is how it is. To be human is to be part of hierarchies, whether manifesting as feudalism, capitalism, socialism or technocracy. In all of them, only a tiny group rise to the top. Mainly, that will include psychopaths and the power-hungry. The more they have, the more they want. That is how our brain’s neurotransmitters work. As individuals in democratic systems, we still have some control over the exact collection of madmen who rule over us. So, suppose you value individual liberties and have grown quite fond of having a title deed and a bank account. In that case, it’s okay to keep an eye out for patterns in the top-level of our societies that you think might disrupt your capacity for self-actualisation. It is fine to see these worrying silhouettes in the halls of influence and talk about it. And it is good manners to allow others to do it. It is not necessary to resort to insults, ad hominems and slurs.
And if the thought of openly wearing a tin foil hat is not acceptable to you, might I suggest tinfoil blindfolds because some of you assholes are utterly blind to any outside suggestions or evidence, refusing to let the light in. You, dingbats, appear incapable of integrating conflicting information, thus simply dismissing anything you don’t understand or are too lazy to research. At your next braai, take the foil off the potato and make some eyepatches because you do not want to see.
I also recommend some aluminium underpants for those so far up their own arse; nuance has yet to illuminate their cerebral virginity.
Finally, might I suggest some tinfoil dildos for those who do not want to acknowledge that we are all being fucked. In our vulnerability, we pretend that we must have asked for it somehow, or ‘is it really that bad?’ or ‘nobody saw it coming’, like Jimmy Savile and social credit scores. You can make your own tinfoil dildo by taking the most giant cucumber you can find from that same braai and wrapping it in heavy-duty foil, bright side out.
And then you make the potato salad and put some meat on the grill. Natural beef. It is healthy and nutritious and you bought the cut of your choice with money you earned yourself. Then go over to your friends and hug them because it is essential and good for you. Sit in your backyard of your own house, drink beer and laugh. And be happy.
The views of the writer are not necessarily those of the Daily Friend or the IRR.